Cyril Kirian

cyril b. kirian

the need to be away, distant and at the same time belong. to be a part of something, let something be a part of you. and desire; desire fervently that that part has some meaning, while secretly hoping that you are a part of the experiment which conclusively proves that there is no meaning, in parts or as a whole.

but you can sit and hope only for so long.

after that, you must get up and do whatever it takes to counter this incessantly growing gnawing need. blunt those teeth, those teeth which dig deep and magnify everything, making you vulnerable, aware and exposed to every sense, every feeling; inside out.

it is in the process of blunting those teeth, both symbiotic and parasitic, that you sharpen yourself - eyes, ears, nose, tongue, mind, heart.
in this insane monologue, one hinged on frantic edges, I am You, and painting is my way of dealing and getting on with it.