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RiffTrax: Cool as Ice Painting

Philip Leister

Painting, Acrylic on Canvas

Size: 48 W x 48 H x 1.5 D in

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About The Artwork

Kevin: I love your song “Informer.” Bill: Dammit. Kevin: Call me and we can “Licky boom boom down.” Bill: I’m not Snow, dammit! Mimsy: Just kiddy corner from there, you’ll find the Sugar Shack. Ice Ice Baby: …Schmucks. Bill: “Schmucks.” Rap game tight like Carl Reiner, yo. Kevin: They’re leaving no doubt that it is the 90s. Bill: Jonathan Taylor Thomas wearing a “Superman Dies” armband and bootleg “Black Bart” Simpsons T-shirt, drinking a Surge and eating Crunch Tators while microwaving a Kid’s Cuisine was less 90s than this. Kevin: Dan Cortese watching “Getting Even With Dad” with a Furby, while a pile of AOL floppys wearing Reebok Pumps and hyper-color shirts perform at Lilith Fair was less 90s than this. Mike: Timur the Lame sacking Haridwar, while Abd al-Azu II succeeds Abu al-Abbas Ahmad II as head of the Hafsid dynasty in present-day Tunisia, while the Ottomans celebrate the birth of Henry the Navigator was less 90s than this!… That may be the 1390s, now that I think about it. Unless… did Timur the Lame ever coach on MTV’s Rock ’n Jock? from ‘RiffTrax: Cool As Ice” (2013: 1991) Starring Allison Dean (“The Prince is in love with me.”), Sydney Lassick (“Franklin, believe me. With your qualifications and background, you’ll land an even better job.”), Heather McCallister (“Eleven, including me. Five boys, six girls, four parents, two drivers, and a partridge in a pear tree.”), Mike Nelson (MST3K: Zombie Nightmare), Video Babe (Last Action Hero), Kevin Murphy (Tom Servo), Dody Goodman (“When I hear music, I just can't make my feet behave.”), John Newton (Alive), Bill Corbett (Eddie’s Dave), Deezer D (CB4), Michael Gross (“That's not Robin Hood, that's Ronald Reagan.”), Robert Van Winkle (‘Have you ever seen a Turtle get down?’), and Naomi Campbell (To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar). Cinematography by Janusz Kaminski (Saving Private Ryan). Written by David Stenn (Beverly Hills, 90210). Directed by David Kellogg (Hagerty’s Gadget).

Details & Dimensions

Painting:Acrylic on Canvas

Original:One-of-a-kind Artwork

Size:48 W x 48 H x 1.5 D in

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Delivery Time:Typically 5-7 business days for domestic shipments, 10-14 business days for international shipments.

I’m (I am?) a self-taught artist, originally from the north suburbs of Chicago (also known as John Hughes' America). Born in 1984, I started painting in 2017 and began to take it somewhat seriously in 2019. I currently reside in rural Montana and live a secluded life with my three dogs - Pebbles (a.k.a. Jaws, Brandy, Fang), Bam Bam (a.k.a. Scrat, Dinki-Di, Trash Panda, Dug), and Mystique (a.k.a. Lady), and five cats - Burglekutt (a.k.a. Ghostmouse Makah), Vohnkar! (a.k.a. Storm Shadow, Grogu), Falkor (a.k.a. Moro, The Mummy's Kryptonite, Wendigo, BFC), Nibbler (a.k.a. Cobblepot), and Meegosh (a.k.a. Lenny). Part of the preface to the 'Complete Works of Emily Dickinson helps sum me up as a person and an artist: "The verses of Emily Dickinson belong emphatically to what Emerson long since called ‘the Poetry of the Portfolio,’ something produced absolutely without the thought of publication, and solely by way of expression of the writer's own mind. Such verse must inevitably forfeit whatever advantage lies in the discipline of public criticism and the enforced conformity to accepted ways. On the other hand, it may often gain something through the habit of freedom and unconventional utterance of daring thoughts. In the case of the present author, there was no choice in the matter; she must write thus, or not at all. A recluse by temperament and habit, literally spending years without settling her foot beyond the doorstep, and many more years during which her walks were strictly limited to her father's grounds, she habitually concealed her mind, like her person, from all but a few friends; and it was with great difficulty that she was persuaded to print during her lifetime, three or four poems. Yet she wrote verses in great abundance; and though brought curiosity indifferent to all conventional rules, had yet a rigorous literary standard of her own, and often altered a word many times to suit an ear which had its own tenacious fastidiousness." -Thomas Wentworth Higginson "Not bad... you say this is your first lesson?" "Yes, but my father was an *art collector*, so…"

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