Don't Make Me Repeat Myself Painting

In my studio there are always at least two paintings going at the same time as well as some small oil sketches on paper or tiny canvases. I've never really liked to sketch- preferring, instead, to let the immediacy and searching show in the final painting. But I'm finding that these small pieces are helping me to work out the color schemes, composition, and movement while remaining finished pieces in their own right. At times, these sketches are actually made after I've already finished the larger painting - in a way it's still working through the process. And that is really the theme of this body of work: Working through it. Not giving up. Most artists can attest to the nagging feeling of giving it all up. Of feeling beat. Wanting to pack up the brushes. But this goes a bit further. As I'm working through the process, I'm also working through chronic pain that makes it difficult to be in the studio as much as I need to be. Namely, migraines dampen my studio practice and interfere with life in general. Working on these abstract pieces, full of turmoil and quick paced lines of repetitive mark making, is a way for me to work around the pain and let it all hang out. The painting process is almost wishful thinking of how I want my health to be- having the authority to take something I don't like and just paint over it. Whether it's from layer to layer, reinventing the color and composition, or taking a previously finished painting and completely painting over it. Start fresh, take control, and have more energy. Searching for the point when it all feels better.