Anticipation - Abstract Impasto Painting

Marianna Mills is a Hungarian visionary artist .. a storyteller through art using various media.. after her divorce in 2013, she arrived to the USA seeking asylum with her two children and living in Maryland since.. In her own words: "..for so many years I was hiding my art away from everyone, as I didn't wanted people to know how I feel in my soul.. I was scared to show how sad and alone I am deep down.. I am a self-taught artist who loves the freedom of just being myself without any limitations to one particular medium. My art is about sharing what is in my heart. I don't create to please the world, but I create to express and share myself with anyone who is willing to embrace it. Since I can remember, expressing my feelings and thoughts through my art has been very important to me, but I had to stop creating many times in my life, sometimes for years.. mainly because my ex husband tried to break me down emotionally too; or he and others wanted me to stop believe in myself; my dreams could come true one day.. they thought if they “break my wings” I could not fly no more.. and some other times life's circumstances stopped me to create. ..those times I felt: I am a living dead.. because creating is my life, I can't live without it. When I take a pictures of something, I want to capture that moment in life and edit the image the way I felt in that split second.. how that place or subject made me feel.. or how I imagine life should look like.. I want to show little things in life what we usually walk past by unnoticed, because they might look imperfect and ugly, but after I edit the image and bring out their “imperfection” in a way how I feel, they can be beautiful and being admired by others.. Because who are we to decide who/what is beautiful or ugly, why did we made this perceptions?? We just have to look beyond the surface and look into the core to see the real thing ..and that's what and should matter in life.. When I paint, I feel free in my soul, I feel connected and helps me think and relax in the same time.. only me, the canvas and the paint what matter in those moments..just watching my hand paint and my visions, thoughts or memories surfacing in front of me on the canvas.. Art and creating was always there for me to surrender to protect my soul from everyday's problems and pain what I have gone through all my life.. I came so far, I have changed so much.. life made me the person who I am now..