Blood on My Hands Painting

From a young age, I had a very analytical mind, which seemed to interfere with my creativity, though I knew even then, I had an artistic bone, however felt it was not something that came to me naturally. I had a very difficult childhood, and internalized all of my hurt pain and fears that created a gaping hole in my heart. And I developed a very serious eating disorder before the age of 10, that I carried well into adulthood. I used it as a cloak to become invisible, and as my eating disorder progressed, I truly began to disappear, and I desperately needed a way to express myself. It was not until 2003-2004 that I finally found my outlet, and a way to pour myself into my art, and I finally found a way to express my feelings in a way that I never seemed able to verbalize. So, self-taught, I poured all of my feelings into my artwork. I feel inspired by the freedom I have on my canvas, and I create my work revolving around words that inspire me, and by the different interpretations those around me may have. I find there is very little that is more gratifying than touching others, or for others to feel touched by my work and relate to my feelings. Then in 2015 I had a traumatic brain injury, which completely turned my world upside down. I had severe loss of coordination, memory loss, confusion, loss of vocabulary, and even difficulty formulating words, making it feel impossible to articulate and communicate, at times even on the most basic level. It was terrifying, and I felt as if I was being buried alive. When words failed me, art succeeded. And I no longer feel invisible or the need to hide. I plan to continue to learn, and to test the boundaries of my talents.