Elements of I, Not Someone Else Painting

My painting begins instinctively, however marks that are more systematic later mask the original organic gestures. This could be a metaphor for the breakdown of individuality when we are thrown into the system of human society. Commonly my paintings include patterned elements (which I read as obsession, the repeated devouring of one’s desire). I paint in layers, each challenging the last. The first layer is purely gestural, followed most frequently by symmetrical structures, ‘the pattern’, while later layers intend to break down that symmetry, making the idea of repetition and uniformity void, until inevitably some form of structure may creep back: perhaps intentionally to disrupt our gaze, to raise questions. I may sound contradictory, a ‘vicious circle’ and to be honest this is true. Perhaps I am using the canvas to question my identity and my place in my environment. It could be that I strive to highlight that breaks in symmetry are a point of learning and reflection and not always one of fear? I use colour consciously, heavily calculated, often disruptive, clashing and jarring, tipping the balance of the patterns symmetry and breaking its seamlessness. I identify with bright colours, enthusiastic and flourishing – colour which can be alternatively seen as aggressive and unsubtle. On occasion I engage with the ‘other side’, Black and White, tones that I see as popular but don’t reflect my true nature, in this I attempt to engage with normality, my struggle with feeling like an outsider. I embellish my works with my own symbols and icons. These are often imagined, a language or motif that I identify with but may be unapparent or ambiguous to others. Each motif is a code that helps me to understand my place in society its secrecy allows me to tread without fear of being read or compromised.