In the abyss of a nightmare Painting

Hello here! My name is Katrin, I was born in Russia in the most beautiful city in the world- Saint Petersburg. I love drawing since I remember my self. But I always was not agree about pushing in art. When everyone told u should to draw this or this. I feel myself always like the Rara avis. The same feelings I have from everything what was touchable by me: dance, writing, music, even friends. I can’t understand why I should to do all like someone did before, like someone tell me how to inspire myself. It wasn’t understandable for my young brain and still understandable for now. At age of 6 years old my parents sent me to study at children's art school on the island of Kronstadt. Maybe u hear about this school because at summer time of 2019 it was amazing exhibition of Aivazovskiy. So, at first I was happy to be at place where I can learn something new. Especially I was falling in love with clay crafting. But all the teachers want the same from all students. It’s wasn’t real art. In one day, then usual teacher was sick, I met my the best mentor in life. After one lesson with this amazing person, I categorically refused go to school if she did not teach me. So my parents decided to take private lessons with her. We did everything in what I was interested, I want to try all technology in art, I want ta try all what I can. My teacher jokingly called me a juicer, as I was a very demanding and energetic child with an endless stream of fantasy. When I was 11 my family prefer to be mostly time in Saint Petersburg, and u was in many different art classes, but I never met such amazing teacher anymore. When I was 20 years old, I started to concentrate in art more. And again I try to mix all technology, all tools and materials. I painted on the walls at home, mixed regular water-based wall paint with acrylics and gouache. I painted on the ceiling. Covered with charcoal on paper. At night I dreamed of a woman whose half of her body was a page of a book. I woke up and in the moonlight from the window i draw on the wall with an ordinary simple pencil. In 2012, I flew to celebrate the New Year on the island of Bali Indonesia. Where I met my future husband, and stayed on the island for another 5 long years, where, together with my husband, she discovered Art for herself from a new side. Now we have been living in Morocco for a year. And all these limitations associated with the virus made it possible to do art more consciously.