"How do you kill that which has no life?" Print

Blizzard Exec #1: Gentlemen, this could very well lead to the end of the world... of warcraft. Blizzard Exec #2: NO! NOOO! [the four World of Warcraft characters walk through the land of Azeroth] Cartman: I am the mightiest dwarf in all of Azeroth! Kyle: [female mage] Wow, look at all these people playing right now. Cartman: Yeah, it's bullcrap. I'll bet half of these people are Koreans. Stan: [stops and motions] Oh crap! It's *that* guy again! [a rogue griefer approaches them and begins to dance, wearing a helmet, boots, elbow-length gloves and tight shorts] Kyle: Who is this? Stan: This is the guy that kept killing us after you went to bed! Cartman: [angry at the griefer] Get out of here, asshole! Stan: He's a way higher level than us. It isn't fair. Kyle: It's all right. He can't kill us unless we agree to duel. [the griefer's character stabs Kenny the hunter, killing him instantly] Stan: [shocked] Oh my God, he killed Kenny! Kyle: [in a soft feminine voice, making a fist and holding it up for emphasis] You bastard! [the griefer kills both Kyle the mage and Stan the warrior] Cartman: [furious at the griefer] Don't you have better things to do than going online killing people? [the griefer begins generating mana power] Cartman: [running off] No! I don't want to start over at the graveyard! [the griefer shoots a fireball at Cartman the dwarf] Cartman: No! [the fireball hits Cartman, killing him instantly; at his room, Cartman looks stunned and throws down his headset] Cartman: That son of a bitch! Kyle: [scene shifts to Gerald's den] Who is that guy? [scene shifts to Randy's den] Stan: [head resting on left hand] Whoever he is, he is one tough badass. [the World of Warcraft characters have just defeated the griefer; Stan the warrior throws away the Sword of a Thousand Truths and walks up to his father's dying character] Stan: [shaking Randy] Dad? Dad? Randy Marsh: [Valkorn the warrior, answering] Staaan. [falters a bit, but Stan holds him up] Randy Marsh: I've never been able to say this before, but... I love you, son. Stan: I know you do, Dad. [Valkorn swats Stan's hand away, then moans a bit and dies] Nelson: Randy, you working on that sediment analysis? Randy Marsh: Now now, Nelson. I just joined a big party of Night Elves and we're going to go and explore the Tower of Azora together. Nelson: Is that a computer game? Randy Marsh: No, r-tard, it's an MMORPG. These are real people I'm playing with. See, I'm a hunter, level 2. I can chat with all these other people. I can even wave to this guy, see? [waves] Randy Marsh: Hello! In the outside world, I am a simple geologist... but in here, I am Valkorn, Defender of the Alliance. I have braved the Fargo Deep Mine, and defeated the Blood Fish at Jarod's Landing. [griefer appears and kills Randy's character] Nelson: Hmm. Looks like that guy just killed you. Randy Marsh: What? Why? WHY? Randy Marsh: Stan! Stan! Stan Marsh: Hang on guys, my dad wants something. Randy Marsh: Stan! Stan Marsh: What? Stan Marsh: You've been on your computer all weekend. Shouldn't you go out and socialize with your friends? Stan Marsh: I am socializing r-tard! I'm logged on to an MMORPG, with people from all over the world and getting XP with my party using teamspeak. [pause] Randy Marsh: [hurt] I'm not an r-tard. Blizzard Exec #1: Fellow board members, we have a problem. Somebody in the world of warcraft is ignoring the world rules, and is going around, killing innocent players. Blizzard Exec #2: Why kill innocent players? The game is about finishing quests! Blizzard Exec #3: We've got to delete him from the servers! Blizzard Exec #1: We can't! Whoever this player is, he has played world of warcraft so much, that he has reached a level we had thought unreachable. He's actually able to kill our admins! And he grows stronger everyday... Blizzard Exec #4: Jesus! Blizzard Exec #5: I've gotta get home! My kids are playing world of warcraft right now! Blizzard Exec #1: Jim... Your kids' characters are already dead. Blizzard Exec #5: No... No! They'd just started playing! Blizzard Exec #2: What kind of person would do this? Blizzard Exec #1: Only one kind... Whoever this person is, he has played world of warcraft nearly ever hour, of every day, for the past year and a half. Gentlemen we are dealing with someone here who has absolutely no life. Blizzard Exec #4: How do you kill that which has no life? from South Park (1997 - forever) S10E8 ‘Make Love, Not Warcraft’. South Park created by Trey Parker and Matt Stone (Love ‘Em.). "Make Love, Not Warcraft" is the eighth episode in the tenth season of the American animated television series South Park. The 147th episode overall, it first aired on Comedy Central in the United States on October 4, 2006. In the episode, named in a play on words after the 1960s counterculture slogan "Make love, not war", Cartman, Kyle, Stan, and Kenny enjoy playing the popular massively multiplayer online role-playing game World of Warcraft. When a high-level player goes around killing other players in the game, they start playing the game every day to try to stop him. The episode was written and directed by series co-creator Trey Parker. In 2015, he and co-creator Matt Stone listed it as their third favorite episode of the series. Despite worries from Trey Parker near the end of production, the episode went on to receive critical acclaim, with critics praising its lampooning of nerd culture, and is considered by many fans and critics as one of the best episodes of the series. The episode additionally went on to win a Primetime Emmy Award for Outstanding Animated Program (for programming less than one hour). South Park is an American animated sitcom created by Trey Parker and Matt Stone and developed by Brian Graden for Comedy Central. The series revolves around four boys—Stan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski, Eric Cartman, and Kenny McCormick—and their exploits in and around the titular Colorado town. The show became infamous for its profanity and dark, surreal humor that satirizes a wide range of topics towards a mature audience. Parker and Stone developed the show from The Spirit of Christmas, two consecutive animated shorts. The latter became one of the first Internet viral videos, ultimately leading to South Park's production. The pilot episode was produced using cutout animation, leading to all subsequent episodes being produced with computer animation that emulated the cutout technique. South Parkfeatures a very large ensemble cast of recurring characters. Since its debut on August 13, 1997, 309 episodes of South Park have been broadcast. It debuted with great success, consistently earning the highest ratings of any basic cable program. Subsequent ratings have varied but it remains one of Comedy Central's highest-rated shows and is slated to air new episodes through 2022. Since 2000, each episode has typically been written and produced in the week preceding its broadcast, with Parker serving as the primary writer and director. A one-hour special episode, titled "The Pandemic Special", premiered on September 30, 2020. Another one-hour special episode, titled "South ParQ Vaccination Special" premiered on March 10, 2021. South Park has received numerous accolades, including five Primetime Emmy Awards, a Peabody Award, and numerous inclusions in various publications' lists of greatest television shows. The show's popularity resulted in a feature-length theatrical film, South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut which was released in June 1999, less than two years after the show's premiere, and became a commercial and critical success, and garnered a nomination for an Academy Award. In 2013, TV Guide ranked South Park the tenth Greatest TV Cartoon of All Time. Source: Wikipedia