The Lottery Vol. 26 (14001) or They'll Love Me When I'm Dead Painting

Many years ago I read an interview with Houshang Golshiri, where he was asked: “Why do you write?” He answered: “For many reasons, sometimes I write to know whether I am in love or not. Once it happened, I was witness to a relationship. I came back home and wrote the first chapter of my book. Then from the musical sense, I had to listen to it. I listened and then realized that he was in love, he was desperately in love. Thus I write to see if I am in love or not. There are times that one is not aware of his standing in society. Several years after the Islamic revolution, around 1980-81, I had no idea what was going on. I had returned to Isfahan and was working as a teacher. Every two weeks or so I traveled to the writing association in Tehran. I also observed what was happening in Isfahan. A friend told me a story that he had become involved in. I told him: ‘I will give you 6 months to sort this out’. After six months I called him and asked him whether he finished the story or not, and he answered, ‘no’. I told him that I would finish the story. I wrote it to see what happens. Sometimes I want to show the truth of Iranian people to themselves, or in other words, to show them their own demons and inner monster. In one of my trips I was accompanied by a writer friend and I realized he was a dictator, a mini dictator, and if he came to power a Hitler would rise from within him. Someone has to show this monster within.” * Maybe what I do in my painting is this; I paint to know if I am in love or not, to know my own state of mind, to know what’s going on and to show humanity’s true self. I paint to record history.