Pieces In An Active Meditation

I am really terrible at being in relationships and dealing with family dynamics. These family tensions cause me stress, and to deal with it I have been meditating every day for about 18 months now. Mediation has taught me a lot about letting go. Letting go of expectations that I have of myself, of my wife, of my sisters, brother and sons. I am someone who cannot sit still for more than five minutes, silent mediation doesn't work for me. So, I invented a way to be active while meditating. I write one thought over and over and over again.