"What about Brett Favv-ruh?" Print

Mary : Did you really mean what you said up there? Ted : Uh-huh. I just want you to be happy Mary. Mary : But I'd be happiest with you. Ted : You're fucking with me, right? [Shakes her head, while smiling] Ted : What about Brett Favv-ruh? Mary : What did I tell you the first time we met? I'm a Niners fan. Ted : I think I still want to look her up. Pat Healy : Who, rollerpig? Are you nuts? Ted : You said she was a real sparkplug. Pat Healy : No, I said buttplug. She's heinous. Charlie Jensen : Is it the frank or the beans? Ted : I don't know, both I guess. Warren : [from outside] Franks and Beans! Franks and Beans! Ted : Japan? What's she doing in Japan? Pat Healy : Well, you've heard of mail-order brides? Well, they go that way too. Ted : What, are they desperate? She's a whale! Pat Healy : You can't forget, it's a sumo culture, Ted. They pay by the pound over there. Sorta like, um, tuna. Hitchhiker : You heard of this thing, the 8-Minute Abs? Ted : Yeah, sure, 8-Minute Abs. Yeah, the excercise video. Hitchhiker : Yeah, this is going to blow that right out of the water. Listen to this: 7... Minute... Abs. Ted : Right. Yes. OK, all right. I see where you're going. Hitchhiker : Think about it. You walk into a video store, you see 8-Minute Abs sittin' there, there's 7-Minute Abs right beside it. Which one are you gonna pick, man? Ted : I would go for the 7. Hitchhiker : Bingo, man, bingo. 7-Minute Abs. And we guarantee just as good a workout as the 8-minute folk. Ted : You guarantee it? That's - how do you do that? Hitchhiker : If you're not happy with the first 7 minutes, we're gonna send you the extra minute free. You see? That's it. That's our motto. That's where we're comin' from. That's from "A" to "B". Ted : That's right. That's - that's good. That's good. Unless, of course, somebody comes up with 6-Minute Abs. Then you're in trouble, huh? [Hitchhiker convulses] Hitchhiker : No! No, no, not 6! I said 7. Nobody's comin' up with 6. Who works out in 6 minutes? You won't even get your heart goin, not even a mouse on a wheel. Ted : That - good point. Hitchhiker : 7's the key number here. Think about it. 7-Elevens. 7 dwarves. 7, man, that's the number. 7 chipmunks twirlin' on a branch, eatin' lots of sunflowers on my uncle's ranch. You know that old children's tale from the sea. It's like you're dreamin' about Gorgonzola cheese when it's clearly Brie time, baby. Step into my office. Ted : Why? Hitchhiker : 'Cause you're fuckin' fired! Mary : Hey, you want to go upstairs and watch SportsCenter? Ted : No, I think I'm just going to quit while I'm ahead. Mary : You're not that far ahead, Ted. Pat Healy : What, you think yer shit don't stink? Ted : No, I don't think, I mean, yes it does, no I don’t… Pat Healy: What the hell is Brett Favre doing here? Brett Favre: I'm in town to play the Dolphins, you dumb ass. from ‘There’s Something About Mary’ (1998) Starring Cameron Diaz (Any Given Sunday), Ben Stiller (Night at the Museum), Matt Dillon (The Outsiders), Lin Shaye (A Nightmare on Elm Street), Lee Evans (MouseHunt), Chris Elliott (Groundhog Day), Markie Post (Night Court), and Keith David (Mass Effect). Written and Directed by Peter Farrelly (Kingpin) and Bobby Farrelly (Me, Myself, and Irene). Brett Lorenzo Favre (/ˈfɑːrv/ (About this soundlisten); FARV; born October 10, 1969) is an American former professional football player who was a quarterback in the National Football League (NFL), spending the majority of his career with the Green Bay Packers. He was a 20-year veteran of the NFL, having played quarterback for the Atlanta Falcons in 1991, the Packers from 1992 to 2007, the New York Jets in 2008, and the Minnesota Vikings from 2009 to 2010. Favre was the first NFL quarterback to pass for 500 touchdowns, throw for 70,000 yards, complete 6,000 passes, and attempt 10,000 passes. A graduate of the University of Southern Mississippi, Favre played college football for the Southern Miss Golden Eagles for four years, setting many school records. He was selected in the second round of the 1991 NFL Draft by the Falcons, with whom he spent one season as a backup before being traded to Green Bay for the Packers' first-round pick in the 1992 NFL Draft. Favre became the Packers' starting quarterback in the fourth game of the 1992 NFL season and started every game through the 2007 season. He played for the Packers for 16 years before being traded to the Jets for the 2008 season and spending his final two seasons with the Vikings. In that time, he made an NFL-record 297 consecutive starts, 321 including the playoffs. Favre's 11 Pro Bowl invitations is the fourth most among quarterbacks in NFL history. He is the only player to win the Associated Press NFL Most Valuable Player Award three consecutive times, doing so from 1995 to 1997, and is one of only six quarterbacks to have won the award as well as the Super Bowl in the same season. He led teams to eight division championships, five NFC Championship Games, and two Super Bowl appearances: Super Bowl XXXI and Super Bowl XXXII. He and the Packers won Super Bowl XXXI over the New England Patriots. Favre holds many NFL records, including most career interceptions thrown, most consecutive starts by a player, most times sacked, and most fumbles. At the time of his retirement, he was the NFL's all-time leader in passing yards, passing touchdowns and quarterback wins; all three records have since been broken. Favre was inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame in 2016. Source: Wikipedia